What To Do If You Can't Pay Child Support

What to Do If You Can’t Pay Child Support Important Disclaimer This guide is for informational purposes only and is not legal advice. The information below is based on general U.S. practices (with a focus on New Jersey, where the author’s experiences occurred) and publicly available resources as of 2026. Laws change. Always consult a qualified family law attorney or your local child support agency for advice specific to your situation. Robert Bulka and 13Chains.com are not attorneys and do not provide legal representation. If you’re reading this because you’re staring down a child support warrant, losing sleep over mounting arrears, or terrified of another arrest — you are not alone. In 13 Chains: Modern Debtors’ Prison: Child Support Trap, author Robert Bulka was arrested thirteen times for unpaid child support. He lost jobs, homes, and years of freedom while the debt kept growing. His raw memoir shows exactly how the system can trap good men in an endless cycle of arrest → job loss → deeper debt. But it also shows there are steps you can take before the sheriff knocks. Start here. Act fast. The sooner you move, the better your chances of avoiding jail, reducing payments, and breaking the cycle. 1. Understand the Child Support Trap (Before It Traps You) Unpaid child support is treated as a serious civil obligation in every state. In New Jersey (and many others), missing payments can trigger: Wage garnishment Tax refund interception License suspension (driver’s, professional) Credit damage Passport Revocation Bench warrants and actual jail time — exactly what happened to Robert 13 times. From the book’s opening chapter “Cereal Killers: Breakfast Behind Bars” (pages 6–8): “I’d been locked up almost six weeks this time, all for non-payment of child support. How the hell do they expect me to pay when I’m rotting in here? If I’d had a steady 9-to-5 and an apartment, this arrest would’ve stripped me of both, leaving me homeless and jobless—on top of owing $800 a week in child support arrears. And get this: the future payments don’t budge.” Key takeaway from 13 Chains: Ignoring the problem makes it worse. The system does not automatically pause or reduce your order when you lose income, get sick, or go to jail. 2. Immediate Action Steps If You Can’t Pay Child Support Step 1: Contact Your Child Support Caseworker TODAY Call your state’s child support office before you miss another payment. In New Jersey: Dial 1-877-NJKiDS1 (1-877-655-4371) Log into the NJ Child Support Case Information Portal Explain your changed circumstances (job loss, medical issues, incarceration, etc.). Many states (including NJ) will work with you on a temporary payment plan or refer you for modification. Step 2: File for Child Support Modification Immediately This is the #1 way to legally lower your obligation and stop arrears from exploding. NJ process: File a motion/application to modify your support order through Family Court or Probation. You must show a “substantial change in circumstances” (e.g., unemployment, disability, incarceration). Do not wait until you’re in arrears or jail. Courts look more favorably on proactive filers. Free forms and instructions are available on NJ Courts website. If you’re already incarcerated, request a Halliwell order (stops enforcement while inside but does not erase the debt). Step 3: Pay What You Can (Even If It’s Small) Partial payments show good faith. Courts and probation officers note effort — it can help avoid contempt charges or jail. Step 4: If a Warrant or Arrest Is Looming Check your status online via NJ Child Support or county probation. Turn yourself in voluntarily if possible — it often looks better than being dragged out at 6 a.m. (see Chapter 2: “Sheriff Is At My Door”). Bring proof of any modification motion you’ve filed. Step 5: Seek Free or Low-Cost Legal Help You do not need to hire an expensive child support lawyer to start. Legal Services of New Jersey (LSNJ): 1-888-LSNJ-LAW (1-888-576-5529) or apply online Northeast New Jersey Legal Services (Hudson, Bergen, Passaic counties): 201-792-6363 or apply here Local county bar association lawyer referral services Veterans: Veterans Legal Program offers free help with child support modification 3. Real Survival Tips from Someone Who Lived It (13 Chains Excerpts + Vlogs) Robert survived 13 arrests by learning the system from the inside. “My 13th Arrest for Unpaid Child Support – What Jail Is Really Like” “Child Support Jail Survival Tips from Someone Who’s Been There 13 Times” Key lessons from the book: Never go to court unprepared — bring proof of income, job search, medical records. Document everything — every call to your caseworker, every partial payment. The “cereal riot” story in Chapter 1 shows how quickly small tensions explode in holding tiers. Stay calm, keep your head down, and use the time to plan your next legal move. 4. Long-Term Strategies to Break the Cycle Job & income help while fighting arrears Credit repair after license/credit hits Debt compromise programs (some states forgive state-owed arrears after consistent payments — ask your caseworker) Co-parent communication — sometimes a private agreement (then court-approved) works better than enforcement 5. Recommended Resources (Updated 2026) Resource What It Helps With Link / Phone NJ Child Support Program Modification, payments, warrants njchildsupport.gov • 1-877-655-4371 Legal Services of NJ Free legal aid for low-income lsnj.org • 1-888-576-5529 Northeast NJ Legal Services (Hudson County) Local free help 201-792-6363 NJ Courts Forms (Modification) Free downloadable packets njcourts.gov child support page Why Read 13 Chains? Because knowing what actually happens inside the holding tier can save you from making the same mistakes Robert did 13 times. Get the book that’s being called “the explosive exposé America has been afraid to read.” Buy <a href="amazon.com/dp/B0GT4KDGYR?tag=jailforanycau-20">13 Chains on Amazon</a> Final Words from Robert “I wrote this book so no one else has to live my nightmare. If you're broke, scared, and facing another warrant - act today. File that modification. Call legal aid.

CHILD SUPPORT